By October 3, 2011 Read More →

What Do Your Kids Call The New Step Mom Or Dad?

Recently, a Facebook friend asked a question that evolved into a heated debate and I wanted to ask you what you thought.

Every child has a mom and a dad–that is the way it is. Some parents are more involved and others are less involved in the upbringing of their children. We have already discussed that. But what happens when one (or both) parents re-marry or become seriously involved with a person who is not the child’s biological parent?

What do you call that person? Does it make a difference based on the personality of the “step” parent? Is a step parent any less of a parent?

My friend was having issues with his ex-wife. His new wife (they have been married two years and have a newborn child) is a wonderful parent to his two sons from his prior marriage–perhaps a better parent than their biological mother. His older sons want to call the “new” mom “mom.” But the biological mom threw a fit.

I can see that. I get it. I am the dad–period! That is a title that can never be taken away.  I imagine it is the same for moms. I know when my ex-wife remarried, my kids called her then-husband by his first name and had no interest in anything else.

What do you think? Do you have some creative alternative names I can share? How did you handle this?

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7 Comments on "What Do Your Kids Call The New Step Mom Or Dad?"

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  1. Anonymous says:

    My name is Becky and am single and it will make my dream come true if i can get a single dad for my self,i really need to presence of a man in my life because i feel lonely most night. Here is my contact……..benard.beauty@yahoo.com I hope someone humble loving and caring would read this and write me back.

  2. christine says:

    i guess it all depends on the relationship between mother and the step mom. being a single mom myself i cud see how it would hurt to hear my son call another woman mom. i guess if the child is not being coaxed into calling the step mom “mom” then he/she is comfortable with that person…..and thats whats important i guess.

    i have a question though….. what if a kids father plays very little role in his life… pays no child support… the fathers side of the family does not acknowledge the baby….but they insist he carries their last name??? i am up against this and i am totally against it. my family adore my son, they help in raising him and will carry all our family values….how do i not let my son carry our name but that f a family who help in no way??? any advise??? pleeeeease?

  3. Miriam says:

    In calling steps Mom or Dad it all depends. The family circumstances and the childrens feelings have to be taken into account here. I am very confident but would probably feel a little weird hearing my children call their step “Mom”.

  4. Miriam says:

    As far as the childs Dad last name. I would hypen it. My last name-the Dad’s.

  5. Name (required) says:

    I just got into the stage of calling my stepmom mom. and when i want her to get me something, i call her mommy and give her one of those long hugs.

  6. Lola says:

    I call her by her first name with a mrs. in the front

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